


The Sherlock Holmes Book Club

by chappysmom



Series: The Sherlock Holmes Club [3]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-06
Updated: 2012-03-06
Packaged: 2017-11-01 13:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/357189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chappysmom/pseuds/chappysmom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Canon!Holmes has regular meetings with the written versions of Sherlock Holmes, too ... but are they as much fun?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Sherlock Holmes Book Club

“I am all for entertaining the public, if that is the only way in which I can promote my scientific methods to the world, but do they have to be so melodramatic about it?”

Canon!Holmes held up his hands in pacification. “Now, now. The film lot aren’t bad Sherlocks, you need to…”

But King!Holmes interrupted. “I do not ‘need’ to. My point remains. They’re too busy posing for the camera and skimming over the evidence to do any real detective work. A quick glance at a crime scene and they automatically know everything they need.”

Douglas!Holmes said, “But that’s how we often seem to normal people, my dear fellow--that we absorb every detail with a glance. You must admit that we often DO. How many times have we awed some client with our skills upon their entering our rooms for a consultation?”

King!Holmes threw his hands up in frustration. “You are missing the point. My objection is that they gloss over all the actual WORK, all the leg work, all the hours bent over a microscope.”

“Some of them may, I suppose, but even Canon, here, has been known to gloss over clues, to keep them from the reader, so that he may amaze them at the end.”

Canon!Holmes protested, “That’s entirely Watson’s fault. He’s the one who wrote up the stories. We just need to remember that the average Englishman does not see the world as we do, and both the stories and the films must do their best to translate our processes for the general public.”

Davies!Holmes scoffed. “Even my housekeeper is more observant than the ‘general public’.”

The Holmeses all stretched out their long legs before the fire.

After a moment, Douglas!Holmes said out of the blue, “I’m just saying that I’ve never been so grateful to subtext. You know how things go with that film lot.”

“What do you mean, dear fellow?” queried Canon!Holmes.

“While I acknowledge something of a fascination with Irene Adler, or Mrs. Norton as I should call her, at least I’m not exchanging mooning glances with the woman, or indulging in romantic nonsense. It’s her intellect and her daring I find intriguing, not her … person.”

Canon!Holmes nodded. “It is one of the quirks to the film versions I find hardest to understand. No matter how they profess to concentrate on observation and not mere appearance, they seem to have the oddest obsession with Miss Adler.” He held up a hand, as if to forestall a protest. “Don’t get me wrong. I admire the woman’s quick wit, and her audacity at greeting me at my own door … well! The woman had flair. But that’s not enough reason to devote so much time to her.”

Recollecting himself, he nodded at Douglas!Holmes. “No reflection on you, of course. You are a subsidiary character in her story, after all. But at least you act in a dignified fashion.”

Douglas!Holmes accepted the comment with a polite nod. “I consider myself fortunate, in fact, in that I was able to hear her sing.”

Canon!Holmes leaned forward slightly in his chair. “And?”

“Sublime.”

With a sigh of regret, Canon!Holmes leaned back in his chair and puffed on his pipe. “Just as I suspected.”

There were nods around the room, but King!Holmes was still not satisfied. “I still don’t understand the obsession.”

The others were suddenly intent on their drinks, and very interested in the mud clinging to each others’ shoes, so that even King!Holmes had to notice, pulled from his display of temper. “What?”

Douglas!Holmes said, tentatively, “It’s just that … of all of us, YOU are the one who got married to a girl half your age, and had an illegitimate son with Irene Adler. I mean, really, my dear chap.”

King!Holmes looked taken aback. “If you wish to talk about Russell, I assure you her intellect is quite as great as my own and she makes an excellent partner.”

Canon!Holmes nodded, wearily. “Yes, dear fellow, we know how you feel about her. I think I speak for all of us when I tell you how very happy we are for you.” Silence greeted his words until he gave a stern look around the room, at which there was a sudden murmur of agreement.

 

"At least I'm not constantly being out-smarted by my much-younger _sister_ ," King!Holmes finally said.

Canon!Holmes suppressed a sigh. “I think we should relax a bit. The people who want to learn our methods still may, and if the films help draw them in where we can engage their intellect, I see no harm.”

And, secretly, in the back of his mind, he wondered what the “film lot” were doing tonight. If they were working on interesting cases, or perhaps just enjoying a quiet evening with Watson and a complex chemistry problem. Sometimes the written Holmes just took themselves too seriously.

**Author's Note:**

> This was much harder than the pieces with the film/tv versions of Holmes. While he's been written and re-written endlessly, there aren't that many full-blown series that have wide-range familiarity. Most of them seem to be one-time deals, and even I haven't read all of them.
> 
> The series referred to here are Laurie R. King's Mary Russell series, Carole Nelson Douglas' Irene Adler series, Martin Davies' Mrs. Hudson series, and a nod to Nancy Springer's wonderful Enola Holmes series. And the original, of course.


End file.
